Go to ...

The Newspapers

Gathering and spreading news from various Russian Newspapers

The Newspapers on Google+The Newspapers on LinkedInRSS Feed

Thursday, March 22, 2018

Russian hackers

Before the election of the President of the United States of America only a little more than a week, and all progressive and non-progressive humanity is closely monitoring the outcome of the exhausting race.

Those who do not know about looming over America of the dangers, believe that the winning democratic candidate Hillary Clinton. And who is aware of who actually steers us elections, understand that the main force behind the trump is the Republican candidate. And this force — Russian hackers, which the Western press picked up on the shield that just saved there. The feeling that only now they determine not only the fate of democracy in America, but the issues of war and peace, not only in terms of sanctions.

To achieve their ambitious goals they hacked the website of the Democratic party, took the party out improper information and passed it to Wikileaks publications. According to Joe Biden, Vice President of the United States of America, Grand officer of the Latvian order of the Three stars and the main identifier of Russians, it is their handiwork, for, as he sometimes puts it, it is impossible to find a seller of donuts without an Indian accent.

So who are the Russian hackers?

This is not some worthless phreakers involved in hacking phone networks to make free calls to each other. It’s the people supernatural powers, not only possessing the capacity to hack into any electronic codes and move freely in the world, but to be born in other countries and have a different nationality.

They don’t claim to be as famous American movie stars Bonnie and Clyde, they say that we Rob banks. And unlike Joe Biden publicly promised a retaliatory cyber attack on Russia, Russian hackers do not declare in advance about the planned actions, and are suddenly and secretly.

A favorite pastime of Russian hackers in addition to hacker attacks is hunting for brown bears. They are doing this, sitting on the Kamchatka Peninsula and simultaneously protecting from enemy sabotage ballistic missiles that fly from all sides at the local Kura test site.

After each successful cyber attack on a potential enemy Russian hackers come to the Kremlin to communicate with the President of Russia. Together they sit in a circle and quiet voices long and lingering singing: “Our service and dangerous and difficult”.

Russian hacker is able to drink a bottle of vodka without snacks and then to catch at once a hundred pieces of pokemon. And if the hacker is female, then another, and a galloping horse will stop, and in a burning hut.

It is because of love in Russian hackers replaced the floor private first class, U.S. army, Bradley manning, after he published a large volume of secret documents about the activities in Iraq and handed them over to Wikileaks publications. The first person he told about his indiscretions, they say, was a former American hacker named Lamo. But it is easy to guess that in fact it was one of the Russian hackers, cleverly disguised themselves as American.

It doesn’t matter who wins the presidential election in America, because they are true winners already became Russian hackers, being in the spotlight of the political debate about the fate of the United States.

They tried to oppose something American hacker named the Jester, simply disgraced themselves, claiming that it hacked the website of the Russian Ministry of foreign Affairs. And the site was an old, no longer valid. And the impact of hacking on global processes is zero. No one even noticed.

Simon Semyonitch


It dawned on

Imagination allows you to dream in a big way.

Smart falls head over heels to let the feeling did not hurt the brain.

The best thing about man said to his bad deeds.

The promises of the liar kept on parole.

Make a woman to be silent, and she’ll lay out everything.

Vladimir Kafanov


Leading — Ganguli of GVILAVA, E-mail: satira@mk.ru


Related posts:
"Nonadapted": "We were expelled even from unformatted festivals"
Spielberg had dinner in Cannes on 11 thousand Euro
In the gallery of modern art hosted the exhibition "All you need is loft
Who's allowed to swear?


More Stories From Culture