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Monday, March 19, 2018

Mr. X in the mask made a mass Declaration of love to them

Soon in musical theatre Shvydkoi — loud premiere of “Princess of circus”, which puts canadian Sebastian Soldevila. Already are the scenery, refined libretto, actors to night rehearsals. And we, the reporters “MK”, also decided to play on Kolmanovskii intrigue: what if Mr. X with a high passion of love, suddenly slips off the scaffolding and as a catechumen to head straight to the city in a large Park, where the evening walks a bunch of people looking for his only — his Theodore?

photo: Natalia Muslinkina

Actor Denis Kotelnikov.

“The man in the mask says” I love you to random girls? — you will be surprised. — Yes, result will be zero! Either a slap or a “fuck off” or “police call.” We decided to test the strength of our X — enough he has the talent to work without any direct scenes in what is called the contact?

As the hero of the immortal operetta invited the brightest actor of Theatre of a musical Dennis Nyquist — he’s the Prince, the woodcutter in “Cinderella”, Raskolnikov in “Crime and punishment” Konchalovsky… Denis responded “mercury”:

— A wonderful idea, I am 13 years old girls in love is due!

No sooner said than done: go to the Park, windlifter terrible, all wrapped in scarves, timidly selves near the water… the Girls are available, since I got here, and walk, but it was felt that the mood at all not a fountain: chilly, boring, money for the cafe there. Denis takes a black box from under the Shoe and begins to carve her a mask.

— What’s with the mask, you have glasses! — ask.

— And even more mysterious. Normal!

He put the recorder in the pocket fashionable coat, latest Dennis asks the photographer to tie a scarf “tastefully” around the neck. A real aristocrat with charm easy distraction and negligence (recall that the stumbling block in Kalman — class differences, in our case, poverty and wealth).

— You just do not get, — I say — and that Shvydkoi will not forgive us: on the eve of the premiere to cut down the best artist!

— I was brought up in a tough environment. If you get sick — my mistake, my problem. I went all the while!

■ ■ ■

We leave Dennis alone with reality, the photographer passes from the rear to out of the bushes to try to catch plan. Here is the first “victim”. (From this point on, the dictaphone transcript of the sounds of a brass band.)

— Girl, you have not seen, there is a gang of killers running around?

— Get to the point, please.

— The point is that I found you your ideal. Friends soon parents from the garden going. There can go. Only there is no toilet. In short, would you agree to marry me?

— And then what?

— Well, of course! Then — a happy life.

Is that all? It’s boring.

— We’re in the basement of the circus will live because I am a jester and circus performer. Want in the basement?

— No. The circus smells very bad. But you, I don’t think circus guys…

Denis before she begins to juggle yellow balls.

— Convinced?

— Well, take my hand. As children we have much? Three you want.

— Let two.

Two? From the beginning differences. In my opinion, your ears are freezing. You do not need to the registry office and in the hospital with pneumonia.

■ ■ ■

Girl… I want to meet you, to then immediately get married. Could you tell me how? I have a strange last name. X. Here is a burden.

Well… uh… I guess the compliment I must say. No, first we need a type to choose, that you swallowed. You don’t like.

Wow. Done that, even about the loot immediately. And the very first words what can I say?

— Uh… Hello!”. I don’t know. You what words you like more? Me — all sorts of…

— We on “you” already?

History think to the girl it involved.

“I’m not a local, no money, nowhere to sleep, all the documents were stolen. Here you would be allowed to stay?

— What is your name though?


— X5 (mark of an expensive car. — Ed.)?

— No, just. In short, will you marry me?

— I, unfortunately, have fish food to buy, and so would definitely.

photo: Natalia Muslinkina
Rare girl refused Mr. X.

■ ■ ■

— Girl, what would you do if you are approached by a handsome man like me by the name of Mr. X immediately and would have offered to marry? And without any ADO!

— Depends on my mood.

Is there?

— Well, if the sun and a good mood are one. But the wind is nasty, and all around nasty, not before marriage.

— What is your name? Accidentally Theodore?

— Randomly Anya.

— Love the circus?

— No. And you’re from the circus?

Yes. Tiger would like to train?

— No. It’s a risk. Nonsense.

— Are you rich?

— I? Yes.

— Can I sleep over tonight? And then, you know, in my van tigress gives birth to…

— No.

And if we get married, it will be possible?

— No. If we get married I’ll sleep with you in the van.

■ ■ ■

— What’s your name?

— Julia. You opinion poll or something, right?

“Something like that. Here you would marry a poor showman went? I only know how to throw balls…

— And you the statistics reveal?

— How to tell you. I just need to get married now. Before the closing of the registry office in half an hour.

— Why do you need marriage?

— Julia, I need a love marriage. Today. I always dreamed of its Theodore — the perfect woman. So here you are, Julia, 100% the same. Go to the registry office on Kutuzov Avenue, where the aunt was the one so cool all these stamps sets. Can the orchestra to order. Are you rich?

— No. But I’m looking for rich. Want to go out of the house. Sick of it all. Why would I want to marry you, if you have nothing?

— We can live in the basement of the circus. Properly, conditions are quite… it’s such a big dressing room, shower. This is just the beginning. I’m going to become the best circus performer. Where’s the honeymoon I will have?

— Standard. In hot countries. In Bali. The surfing.

— Well in Bali, I somehow get enough money to… his balls. Agree?

— What to do with you? And this is not a poll?

■ ■ ■

— Girl, ay! I don’t remember who here gave the book half an hour ago, don’t you?

— Definitely not me.

— Tell me, now, if you were approached by a young man and…

So, you have come.

— Let’s say. Look here, what’s my mask. I work in a circus… You like the circus?

I don’t like hitting animals. Although they live in the circus better than some people in Russia.

But what to do — the animals only understand the whip. I ride two tigers, elephant and crocodile scientist. What is your name? I — IKS.

photo: Natalia Muslinkina

— Iksin?

— Almost. Look, as you’ll see if we’re right today will you marry me? To date there are mineral water and sausage (taken out. — Ed.).

Is that all?

— I’m not rich.

Why do I have a husband who will earn less than me?

— And if I’m a multimillionaire? Go?

— What’s the catch?

— You learn on the way to the Registrar. I’m a romantic, you know? Want to spontaneously arrange. Why not? Romantic. In politics nothing don’t know do not understand what do not like Jews. Just want to love. Let’s elect? How much time do you want?

— Not a day or hour. Week… I don’t know.

■ ■ ■

Well, well, girl, when you devoteees at the fountain, I want to talk to you. No, I don’t have a business. What is the name?

— Alain.

— Let’s say you would have liked me and suddenly proposed marriage, because you are my ideal, as beauty Theodora. Would you come out?

— Let’s say Yes. And Theodore is a Saint?

For me, Yes. If we get married, can I live with you?

— I dreamed that someone I have lived. So come on all ready. I’m the only one from Grenoble. Go? You a place booked. Maybe a friend at the same time in the harem along?

— No, seriously.

— Seriously — I need to love, man. But somehow that’s not love turns of life… that is the question.

— You love someone?


But he never reciprocates?

You are an asshole.

Is my right hook. To hell with it! He doesn’t understand you. And you and I are love at first sight.

— I agree, because I wonder what you will say next.

— It is clear that — in the registry office in the basement of the circus, I’m a circus performer, live there. How do you coffee in bed to cook — middle or deep fried?

— Not yet invented. This circus? I have three nights in the train. I will bring you home to your parents — “Mom, he’s going to live with us?”

— I will go quietly, they will not notice. Tat-tat-tat.

— Then seriously ask you: are you ready to marry the first counter?

— We have ten minutes to speak, and until we get to the registry office, all each other know. Freeze completely, but will love.

— What you funny — well, that’s the main thing. Good eyes. Well, what after the wedding?

— In Bali. Seen in the Internet pictures. Beautiful.

I want to Bora Bora. In theory I agree, but have yet to meet. Give me the phone.

photo: Natalia Muslinkina
To the Registrar with a black mask for 5 minutes.

■ ■ ■

— Girl, you saw how I stuck to that young lady?

— Do not pay attention.

I’m really having a problem. I’m here for a reason, and you go by.

— But I same reason.

— A young man waiting, which would knock me out with the move?

— No.

What if I offered you marriage today? As Mr. X could offer the beautiful Theodore?

— Perhaps I would agree. But I have to know the purpose.

— Spend the rest of our lives together.

Is not the goal.

— Then: you have until the end of days will be a problem with me, I promise.

— I agree.

I can live with you?

— At a certain scenario, Yes.

— What are you currently doing here?

— Work in Museum of modern art. Assistant chief curator. And want you to convert to their faith. You think this is you harassing me. But in fact the opposite.

— Well, after an hour in the registry office, all right?

An hour later I have plans. Tomorrow free.

— Today will buy you a dress wedding.

— No. I’m in jeans I want. Me name is Katya.

■ ■ ■

Did Mr. X its Theodore — the question remains open. But what intense cold, he “saved the night” a dozen girls their proposals of marriage — fact. The exam on the charm and artistry sustained. Now you can go to high drama.

NB. We apologize to the circus artists for the frequent use of the word “circus” in proptrade to say “circus”, “circus” — same as the fire Department about the fire, but with vernacular norm it is pointless to fight.


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