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Saturday, October 22, 2016

Novels in ten lines

Dear No. 7112485! I love you! You impressed me from the first meeting (will dare to remind: this happened near the house No. 841, street No. 785422) lasting impression. Oh, what are your options: 90h60h90 (as far as I can see with the naked eye). And how you smelled of Chanel No. 10021! I would like to see you again. Come to the restaurant or cafe 80041 No. 902114, where I am, respectively, from 9.00 to 18.00 and from 19.00 to 24.00, since I work there as an accountant. Come! You will not regret! I’ll give you a bouquet (21 of flower) and a certificate for a free Cup of tea (Georgian No. 20221).

Your 63146.

photo: Alex geldings

The knowledge of life

Until then, well he knew life! After seeing a couple of young lovers, when the mere sight of a beardless boy face and pretty makeup, with a handsome face girls would safe to assume (100%), as will be their inept, perhaps the first in the life of every intercourse: she would wait unprecedented, and he, freed from the glare, discover the heart-wrenching emptiness and loneliness, which from now on will be permanent, do not let go even for a moment the companions of all his loves, he will understand: the main thing — not intimacy, but what will follow then, that can offer woman in addition to the bed, and all life will seek women who know how to attain it his state of emptiness and to fill the notions of being inexhaustible. Near the one who has the patience and have the imagination to invent an all-new adventure, he will remain. And cast this fool is angry, but because of other advantages, in addition to symmetrical facial features, she is not, her life does not work out, for enough to be right, just needed a little more to egoity.

The game

Children’s game — mercury glittering ball, pebble, rolling around in a sealed container (we need to drive it in one of the holes, esperada relief of inner plane) are brought to his own life. Was going to decide in a rich firm, good place — had failed, rolled on, wanted to settle in Europe — did not work, now rolled around in a wild country. What can you do if the hole was just there?

Everyone’s life that pushes into the groove, everyone is looking for shelter where ever — if only to catch, to get into a niche, and — for the sake of peace and stability — where not only is rolling, where not only rushes!

Catcher stories

Watched move out of a rented apartment tenants: collect things, throw the rest in the fridge and the cupboard products — bread, cereals, barely opened bottle of sunflower oil… He thought, “Brought to see that the blockade of Leningrad and those who died from starvation in the Nazi and Stalinist concentration camps… What would they say about this? Probably, they have some forces left to speak. They would be edible for wealth give anything. New time — new living conditions, new preferences. Food can burn it, bury it… If it were possible to send a parcel from present day to the past!”

Two sons

Left left the mother alone.

Soon his father drowned, entangled in the nets, when’t a poacher.

The eldest son began Dating a girl classmate. She ran away from him. Was looking, decided that she was in the den. But she went to the monastery. Married priest, became a priest’s wife.

He never married. Went to see her, and talked about God. Under her influence he had sold his room in the parental home: it is necessary to get rid of excess wealth.

Younger brother became, on the contrary, the head of the realty firm. Bought apartment.

Mother drank sulfuric acid. She was a teacher of chemistry. But managed to read the burial service in the Church — thanks to the ex-wife of the first son.

Let’s have fun

Sat in the Conservatory and listened to “waltz of the flowers” by Tchaikovsky. It was quite clear from the music, what they say to each other dancing violets and dahlias, “Oh, thank you! We were promised lower inflation and rising world oil prices, we were promised the legalization of misappropriated funds and mitigate tax legislation, as well as the increase in GDP. We are so happy with this believe do not find a place here, and whirl in a waltz. We will continue to rejoice, let us rejoice that life was going so happily and well!”


— Are you grandpa? — asked the doctor.

He nodded.

The doctor furtively looked around, although in the office no one except them was not, and whispered:

— Listen, the good of parents, no, let the boy mess around in the dirt. Even will pick up worms — it is normal, will be healthier. Children grow up today distillyatsii. Even the soap consists entirely of washing powder. It is a guarantee of future allergies and illness.

That matters?

Called and said a friend had died.

After words of sympathy and mandatory in such cases, ‘ ooh ‘ and ‘ Aah ‘ had something to say, and he began to ask: when, what… Like it mattered. But have to say, blather something, it was impossible to keep too long a pause.

Useless words endowed with considerable value in such situations.

The cleaning lady

Looked at the maid, diligently washing the floor. Her pathetic attempt to ruffle in a small provincial airport looked ridiculous and pretentious: makeup on a tired face, neat hair… Grabbing for straws in an attempt to survive and preserve the dignity of the woman was caused by acute pity. What are the tricks, if you really (and everyone sees) you mudmover and are the last, nizehonko rung of the social ladder? How is the slide? These invisible stairs? In fact, at first probably had dreams, ambitions, efforts, which had (for what reason?) to refuse. As generally happens, the stratification, the distribution of people on the scale of prosperity? Who goes up, who goes down? Much depends on the parents (and if they disregard the fool?), from the area where he was born and raised… Active travel to the capital, the weak give in, accept the reality… “Who would I be if I had been born here?” he thought.

Business cards

For some reason he kept the business card of the dead — sometimes with inscribed them still live hand phone numbers. What are those who lost the meaning of the paper? If he was going in the world to pay visits or to call mobile or landline devices…

A direct benefit

The surgery was successful. Otherwise it could not be. Simple operation with right — sided inguinal hernia. Besides did an acquaintance. A good doctor — relative friends. Money for his virtuoso work refused to take. But, of course, had to repay the gift. These same friends said:

— Buy a good, expensive bottle. Is just appropriate. New year on the nose.

Did purchased. But at the last moment heart trembled, strangled toad. I bought at the supermarket and in the kiosk market. Where it is cheaper. Beautiful and the label corresponds to the stereotypes, but the soul scraper. It is for loyalty and complacency ten times the sticker was examined possobly the nail. Like normal. And the wife calmed down, said:

— These bottles are still from the same warehouse. Carry about at different points in the supermarket for the same tear more expensive, that makes all the difference.

Put in a beautiful package, carried, presented.

Familiar call in two weeks:

— Can you imagine the misfortune, the doctor, well, did you surgery, blind. And his assistant is too. What kind of shit we drank singed. Is it possible to be so promiscuous?

Broke out in a sweat.

It was necessary to operate the still left sided hernia.


In his younger years, having heard from the girl that she is busy and cannot see him, he tried to check her extended version: called her back — in the hours when she, according to her, had to leave: suddenly cheating and sitting at home? And with a cavalier! Or even one sits bored, that’s too bad: it means that nobody needs, but not wants to see him.

The advent of mobile phones brought the check.

What’s the use to call and bump into another resourcefulness? And listen to a lie? And why to check the veracity? People behave as they see fit. He could change their psychology? Permanent deception — a natural part of life, as a harsh truth.

Yes, and he was old, tired. To catch others in the word.


How can there be justice? Went on our honeymoon on the sea. She went for a swim, began to sink. He saved her, and he went to the bottom — apparently, a heart spasm. Swimmer-he was good. She mourned-mourned and remarried. Cheerful and carefree. And he, who saved her and drowned, lying in the ground. Well at least managed to get out of the water and bury.


He said to the mistress:

— Of course, you wanted me to leave my wife for you. But, you know, what’s amazing? My marriage has not crumbled thanks to you. When the relationship with his wife was tense and went racing, I was hiding from you. In those moments when I couldn’t look at her without disgust, found comfort from you. If arguing with her, it was licking its wounds you have had the opportunity to get close to you confidence and peace. And then, after experiencing home storm-bad weather, returned to legitimate their own half. Was not happy with her.

He thought and added:

— But there is no certainty that would be happy with you.

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